>> Thursday, April 16, 2015
Whenever Bug is sick, we know what that does to his seizure threshold. This one is no different. He's miserable but NO fever which means: no relief from seizures.
Watching him sick is depressing. And I do NOT say that flippantly. It really is. He struggles to play, but then falls asleep, his nose runs everywhere and he doesn't eat...and then...he seizes. The world really does slow down dramatically when he is ill, it has to so we can make sure he doesn't get hurt. Because when he does want to stand up and move around, he falls over, or hurts his foot. We were on broken foot watch for a few hours yesterday.
He had been asleep on the couch and then decided to wake up and try to walk. He stumbled a bit and, while trying to walk, put his foot under the couch. The couch has a wooden frame and, of course, that's where he put his foot. Then he fell over. I lunged to the floor to move the toys and grabbed him. I had to pull his foot out from under the couch and that's when I heard the little whimper. I was gently pulling his foot out, it didn't get caught, he just levered the top of his foot against the wood and scraped it up a little. But the whimpering. He had a furrowed brow and was just making the saddest little noises. I thought: damn. he broke it again. But after a few hours he was walking around normally. Cast: averted.
It just rips my heart out watching him lay there. Other children try to get up and play and mostly, they shake it off. It's gross but not pathetic. Bug is pathetic and sad and drools out a lot of his meds. There is no comfort he will accept and no relief that works. He will be like this for a week. A week. No matter the illness, a week.
I hate this.