>> Monday, March 16, 2015
On March 11, 2014, my lovely FB friend and completely naughty Mommy, Laurie lost her lovely boy Andy to Otahara Syndrome. That loss was raw, emotional, heartbreaking in the midst of what we had going on at the time. When Andy passed, I spent an evening watching Bug sleep. Wondering what in his genetic code we were missing that could mean an early loss. I watched him breathe and sigh, the sure sign he is asleep. I cried for Laurie, such pain, I hope to never know but I have resigned myself to maybe feeling. I am a Mother, and a Mother of child with a scary condition that has no basis in science yet, it's a very real possibility still. The loss of Andy sat heavy on me.
Too much sometimes, I believe.
He is sleeping now, after a tonic/clonic seizure, after I held him and assured him that it would be alright, that I would not let anything happen to him. He is sleeping now, and tonight, I may just have to sleep next to him.