>> Friday, October 31, 2014
I have posted before about how every so often, one of the tens of thousands of seizures my little prince has, affects me profoundly. This morning's seizure did just that.
Maybe it's the time of year...I skipped over his seizureversary on the 25th because I couldn't deal, and I haven't decorated for Halloween yet. Maybe it's watching his little sister hit that age when he started seizing and wondering...
Maybe it's also watching Aiden do all the things Bug used to do and more, and maybe it's remembering how much Bug loved Halloween. I recall two-year old Bug's little puppy-butt walking from door to door and his face lighting up when he realized that when he knocked on the door, they would give him candy. With each door, and each piece of candy, he would turn around, hold it up and smile at me. He only did that for that one Halloween. By the next Halloween, he wouldn't touch the candy and we gave him slim jims and he had only had 9 seizures by then.
Maybe it's all of those things that caused me to cry for 20 minutes after his seizure this morning. And maybe it's none of those things. Either way, I won't dwell it, I will move forward, dress Bug up as a Ninja Turtle (Donatello) and we will enjoy our not-seizure-free Halloween. For the 8th year in a row. Seizures have always intruded. And I have always resented that. But he is smiling and making noises so off we go...no more tears...onto the fun!